Lessons From a Year Abroad
After graduating college, I had a year where I worked in a very temporary job, continued living in my university town, hung out with the same people, and, overall, played life safe. I was comfortable, but not truly happy, or fulfilled by my current environment. My heart longed to be out of Colorado, to see more of the world, and there was a straightforward way to do it through a Teach Abroad Program in Madrid; it was calling my name. But, taking that leap meant accepting almost everything in my life would change, from my daily routines, to how far I was from my family, to ending a relationship with my boyfriend of 4 years. These were many hard pills to swallow, and it took me lots of time with my thoughts to hit the button to accept my position officially, jumpstarting the rest of my journey to Spain.
This choice to move, a choice I almost backed out of, ended up being the best thing I could’ve done for myself.
I’ve always been someone who veered on the side of playing things safe. I’m attached to my “things”: my bed, my room decor, my plants, my routines, my people, my pets, my job, etc. It’s hard for me to roll with the punches that can come with change, and it’s hard for lots of us because, as humans, we want to maintain our comfort. However, what better time to take leaps of faith than as a young person in your 20s; it’s the perfect age to figure out what you like! Moving to Spain a year ago to teach English was so far out of my comfort zone; I had never moved so far from my family, had only been overseas once, spoke very little Spanish, and knew nothing about teaching. Now, flash forward a year, and I loved it so much that I’m going back to do it all again after the summer ends.
Even though I feel so happy about this choice now, I learned a lot of different lessons along the way during the harder parts of this journey. I hope these “lessons” might inspire you to take a leap of faith in your life and do something new that scares you but is calling to you. I also connected with BabesRising ambassador, Molly, who recently moved and is working in Thailand (!!!), to put this list together. While these lessons come specifically from our experiences of moving outside the USA, they can be adjusted to fit many changes you might encounter in your life!
Immerse Yourself: In the context of moving abroad, this just means immersing yourself into as much of the culture as you can! Embrace cultural differences (even if it feels uncomfortable at first), learn and practice the language, try all the foods, and find places to meet and connect with locals. If you’re working abroad, connect with your coworkers, you’ll learn so much about the culture you’re living in just by speaking to them! Even though this tip might feel specific to moving out of the US, the “immerse yourself” attitude can be taken into lots of different contexts. If you’re starting grad school or a new job, connect with the people and the environment as much as you can to acclimate yourself into your new space and routine!
Stay connected to home: Moving overseas makes you feel immediately disconnected from your friends, family, and home. You’ll likely feel busy with the daily chaos of living in a completely new environment, but schedule regular calls to your loved ones to feel connected and looped in on what’s happening back home. I had moments where I let weeks pass by without calling someone I loved and, all of a sudden, I felt farther away than ever.
When feeling homesick (because it will happen), make a comfort meal, watch a comfort film or TV show, write in your journal, listen to your favorite music/podcast episode, facetime someone from home, take a long stroll or intentionally move your body in a way you love.
Keeping in touch with your loved ones is important in any aspect of our lives, even if you’re not moving away. In times of change, we need the support and comfort of the people we trust and love the most!
Seize, seize, seize: Seize opportunities that come your way! Go to the sports game, go to a language exchange, meet up with your coworkers for lunch, explore the crevices of your new city, travel lots, lean into your new friendships, be present, and do! I was so scared of doing anything alone that, unless someone I knew was also going to an activity, I wouldn’t do it. I am ditching this mindset before starting my second year in Spain because I missed out on lots of cool experiences and opportunities to meet new friends! Put yourself out there!
Feel your feelings: There will be many moments of discomfort, sadness, anger, anxiety, and so on and so on. Feel these things. Give them their moment so that moving onto the positive moments becomes easier. Put on music and cry, go for a run to push energy out, dump your feelings into your journal, and just find an outlet that works for you to work through these things.
Keep putting one foot in front of the other: When I first arrived in Spain, it was so emotionally and mentally challenging, I had many feelings come up of “why am I here”, and I was moments away from packing up my suitcase and going home. I am so glad I didn’t give up on the journey. It will NOT be picture-perfect (it took me MONTHS to feel settled), and even in the hardships just remember that you are doing something unique, exciting, and new.. Every challenge or setback is a learning experience, and you’ll come out of it with lots of stories that you’ll look back on and smile at. Take one thing at a time, and trust that you will learn how to make sense of things.
For those who are reading this because they are going abroad, or are currently there, I’m also including some advice around things you can do to ease the discomfort you might experience.
Keep a list of “your people” with you - prioritize connecting to them daily, especially in the moments when you feel uncomfortable emotions/feelings.
You can write this list in the notes section of your phone and/or write it down on a piece of paper and put it up on your fridge!
Check-in with at least one person from the list every single day, especially in the moments when you feel sad, lonely, frustrated, anxious, or anything else.
Send a voice note, or a quick text, open up, and allow yourself to feel fully supported by your people (even if they aren’t physically with you).
Move your body daily - to support your mental health and move any heavy emotions/feelings through your body.
This can look like taking a long walk each day, going on a run with some of your favorite music, doing an online yoga class, or attending a H.I.I.T. class, boxing, or weight-lifting or strength class like CrossFit!
Doing this regularly can help flush out the uncomfortable emotions as they come up and therapeutically utilizing exercise will support you a lot.
Make sure you have a space that feels cozy and safe - take the time to set up your home so that it feels super grounding and comfortable for you to use as a little safe haven in the moments you need it!
Add things like photos, crystals, plants, candles, and comfy blankets/pillows to make your space feel safe for you, it will be so soothing to your nervous system!
Don’t judge yourself if you need to just curl up in bed sometimes with a blanket and listen to some of your favorite music or a comfort show to soothe your heart.
Journal dump or voice memo out your deepest thoughts/feelings - when things feel like they’re building up and getting overwhelming, pull out a journal or your voice recorder on your phone and just get it all out.
Don’t censor yourself, just express yourself!
You can, of course, do this with a friend/family member, too, but sometimes it can help to just express yourself, too.
I hope this builds inspiration in you to step beyond your comfort zone, no matter how scared it makes you feel. I was 23 when I moved, and I had been having feelings of imposter syndrome, and thoughts of being not enough; not smart enough, not brave enough, not cool enough, not outgoing enough, etc. to do the things I wanted. Now almost a year later, I feel so capable and proud of myself for the life I was able to build over there. Even though those feelings of not being enough still come up, by pushing myself out of my comfort zone and dropping into a new environment, I was able to challenge them, and I now believe that I am smart enough, brave enough, cool enough, outgoing enough to do what I wanted to do, and what I will do in the future!
Did you find this blog helpful?
🌻 Share it with a friend!
🌻 Screenshot and share on Instagram - make sure to tag us - @babes_rising and we’ll re-share!
Are you a young woman in your 20’s focusing on loving and caring for yourself?
Check out our group coaching journey - through customized coaching, empowering group coaching workshops, and transformational tools (like affirmation audio tracks and journaling prompts) we’ll help you connect to yourself, love yourself, and create a life that lights YOU up.
📷: Isabel Lopez
